Lexicon: Words for Feelings
Find words for feelings, body cues, and uncertainty.
This lexicon is a starting aid, not a complete map of emotion science. It is for people who want more words to compare, reject, adapt, or bring into conversation.
Alexithymia is commonly described as difficulty identifying feelings, difficulty describing feelings, and a more externally oriented thinking style (Luminet, Nielson, and Ridout, 2021; Taylor, Bagby, and Parker, 1997). A word list cannot diagnose alexithymia, prove what someone is feeling, or replace clinical support. It can sometimes make reflection less blank.
Using the word list
Use these words as prompts, not answers.
- Start with what is easiest to notice: the situation, body cues, action urges, energy level, or whether something feels pleasant, unpleasant, mixed, or unclear.
- Pick a broad word first. “Unpleasant,” “activated,” “flat,” “tense,” or “not sure” is a valid starting point.
- Try two or three nearby words instead of forcing one exact label.
- If no emotion word fits, record the facts: what happened, what your body did, what you wanted to do, and what changed afterward.
- For personal mental-health, trauma, medication, diagnosis, treatment, or immediate safety questions, consult qualified support outside AAN.
Simple dimensions
Some emotion frameworks describe feelings using broad dimensions such as pleasant/unpleasant valence and activation/arousal. Russell’s core-affect model is one influential dimensional approach (Russell, 2003; Russell, 2009). Other frameworks organize emotion words into categories or families, such as Plutchik’s wheel or Willcox’s Feeling Wheel (Plutchik, 1980; Willcox, 1982).
AAN treats these as vocabulary scaffolds. Different models make different scientific assumptions, and none should be treated as the final answer for every person, culture, or situation.
| Question | Plain-language anchors | Example words to compare |
|---|---|---|
| Does this feel pleasant, unpleasant, both, or neither? | valence | pleasant, unpleasant, mixed, neutral, conflicted, unsettled |
| Is the body calm, activated, shut down, or restless? | arousal / activation | calm, alert, wired, tense, heavy, numb, restless |
| How strong is it? | intensity | faint, mild, noticeable, strong, overwhelming |
| Is there an action urge? | motivation | approach, avoid, freeze, hide, protest, repair, ask, rest |
| Is another person involved? | social context | connected, rejected, embarrassed, trusted, pressured, lonely |
| Is the best answer “I do not know yet”? | uncertainty | unclear, blank, confused, muted, hard to tell, changing |
Starter word banks
These lists are intentionally modest. They are not a theory, diagnosis, or ranking.
Pleasant or wanted
calm, content, relieved, interested, hopeful, grateful, safe, connected, proud, amused, playful, delighted, energized, confident, affectionate
Unpleasant or unwanted
sad, disappointed, lonely, ashamed, guilty, anxious, afraid, angry, irritated, disgusted, jealous, hurt, overwhelmed, helpless, trapped
Activated or high-energy
alert, excited, eager, restless, tense, panicky, furious, agitated, startled, impatient, pressured, determined, keyed up
Low-energy, muted, or shut down
flat, tired, numb, heavy, foggy, bored, withdrawn, empty, discouraged, resigned, detached, frozen, quiet, drained
Mixed, uncertain, or hard to name
ambivalent, conflicted, confused, wary, unsettled, tender, bittersweet, embarrassed-but-relieved, angry-and-sad, hopeful-and-scared, “not sure,” “too much,” “nothing obvious”
Useful distinctions
Emotion, feeling, and affect
People use these words differently. In many plain-language contexts, “emotion” and “feeling” overlap. In psychology writing, “affect” may refer to broad felt tone, observable expression, or valence/arousal depending on the author and context. When precision matters, define the word before using it.
Body cues are clues, not proof
Body sensations can be relevant to emotional awareness, but a sensation does not always map to one emotion. Tight chest, stomach tension, heat, tears, numbness, or restlessness can have many possible meanings, including non-emotional or medical ones. Use body cues as clues to explore, not as automatic translations.
Specific words can help, but they can also be too much
More precise vocabulary may help some people describe patterns and communicate needs. It can also feel overwhelming or artificial. It is okay to use simple anchors like “pleasant/unpleasant,” “activated/calm,” “safe/unsafe,” or “I do not know.”
Different models disagree
Basic-emotion, constructionist, appraisal, dimensional, and body-based accounts do not all explain emotion in the same way. For example, constructionist accounts emphasize categorization and context rather than fixed emotion modules (Barrett, 2016; Barrett et al., 2025). Do not treat one model as settled science.
A quick reflection template
If a direct emotion label is hard, try this:
- Event: What happened?
- Body: What sensations, energy level, or changes did I notice?
- Action urge: Did I want to move toward, move away, freeze, hide, argue, repair, rest, or ask for help?
- Word candidates: What two or three words might fit, even partly?
- Confidence: low, medium, high, or “not sure yet.”
- Next step: Do I need rest, information, support, a boundary, professional help, or time?
Related pages
- FAQ — common questions about alexithymia and assessment boundaries
- Digital Tools & Apps — cautious guidance for tools that may support vocabulary or reflection
- Robert Plutchik — one emotion-vocabulary framework, with caveats
- Support — community and professional-support resources